New Years Day

A new year is just a two days away. I was invited back this year to Palm Springs for New Years eve with friends, so I am packing up and will fly out in the morning. They have rented a house in the Palm Canyon Villa neighborhood. It is around 2600 square feet with 4 bedrooms, 4 bathrooms (and a guest powder room), pool and hot tub (as always) and views of the gardens and mountains from the hot tub. This house sounds even nicer than where we stayed last year which is hard to conceive since the place last year was a gorgeous patio home right out of the early 60's. It was very retro all the way thru in a very old Hollywood meets Palm Springs kind of way that is hard to describe unless you have spent any time in this city. This year we have more people joining our annual get together, so I am eager to see and make some new friends from around the country. I think last year that Seattle, Las Vegas, LA, Phoenix and NYC were represented. Plus, with everything that has been going on in my life, I need to just get away for a short time for myself. I have spent too much of this year putting others needs in front of mine and I need to treat myself a little nicer.

In other news, my sister was released from the hospital last week. I was talking to my mom and she was very happy to see her outside of the hospital. I was worried I would have to fly back soon to Lexington, KY, but I think things are beginning to settle down there. It is not that I don't enjoy seeing my family; it is just small town life is not for me--I have become accustomed to the conveniences of large cities.

Well, I need to have dinner and pack for my flight in the morning so I can make sure I have everything I need. Until next year.

Under My Umbrella

I just got back yesterday from an emergency trip home. My sister was put into the hospital with a serious thyroid problem and my mom was freaking out a little. She was still in the hospital when I left and the Dr's think she may have Graves disease, but I just couldn't stay any longer. I was planning on going back for a couple of days, but not for a couple of weeks. I have been without internet access (except if I went to the library) and my cell phone doesn't work very well in the hills of southeastern KY and I was a little stir crazy. But, I got to see snow (and LOTS of rain). In fact, it rained hard for the last week I was there and there was flood warnings over most of the state. The news said the drought in KY was over. Here is a picture I took from my rental when I snuck away for one of my guilty pleasure lunches...this picture was taken during a break in the rain, but you can still see all the clouds. I know white castles (probably) aren't good for you, but they are almost a comfort food when I am back east.

But, now it is back to reality. I have so many things I need to get caught back up on now that I am back in PHX. I have an interview for another position with my company after the holidays. It is a step up in pay and is a move in a different direction than I am currently on, but the office I would be working out of is closer to my home so overall I think it will be a good thing. I will miss many people I work with now and all of the people I supervise now, but I think this is the direction I need to be moving in at this time.

Blame it on the Rain

After 41 days, it finally rained in PHX. Too bad that instead of washing my car, it now looks like I am the one needing to clean it... Such is life when you choose to live in a desert. My mom's birthday was last month and I was commenting to her that I didn't have to scrape the sunshine off of my car windows and then here I am this week with a squeegee on the windows to clean the dirt off. Still better than ice and snow anyday, is what I say. Can't you tell by the smile on my face? Actually, I was playing with my camera last week to try and learn some of the features on it I haven't used yet. That smile is pure cheesy and kind of lame, isn't it?

Speaking of lame things, I recently met a really nice guy; we met up a couple of times at some bars in town, talked on the phone and IM'ed each other and then out of the blue, I get this text message telling me I should run away from him; that he is bad news and that I am better off. I just don't understand why people have such low opinions of themselves. I know as gay people we are frequently put down by those around us, told how we are going to hell and even physically attacked by society. I also know that different people deal with trauma and stress in different ways. I just don't understand how people can't have any self respect and a desire to learn, grow and make something better of themselves than others think is possible. Maybe that is something that is just innate in me and their feelings are just as natural a response to them. I don't know. I do know for me, having grown up in a small town, and knowing that small town life was not for me, that I had to teach myself and learn and push myself to bigger and better things or that I would never get anywhere in life. It seems the only other option was to die and I definitely did not want that. The sad thing about it all is this: I sincerely liked him from what I knew of him after just a few weeks and had not yet had a chance to pick apart his flaws...But, I am glad I discovered this 'flaw' now; I just do not have the time or energy to be a mother/father/lover and try to 'change' someone into something they are not (and will never be). I have learned from past relationships that people are who they are and I can't bring home and rescue every lost puppy. Even the strongest monsoonal rains in PHX are not enough to wash away some people's sins and guilts, so what makes me think I am better at it than nature. Until next time...

Everybody Dance

Finally!! My training classes are finished and I can get back to my team and back to my regular schedule. The older you get, the more you want stability and regularity in your life. I am not saying I disapprove of adventure and spur of the moment activities (I am a Gemini after all), it is just nice to get back to more familiar territories every now and then. In celebration of my final days of class (and the fact that one of the biggest gay holidays was this past week), I took myself out for some drinks. I am pleased to say I did it without having a cigarette, but there was a moment or two when the urge was there quite strongly (luckily I had some firm assistance who would not share his smoke). I am quite proud to say I haven't had a cigarette since January 5th of this year now which is the longest I have made it without one since I started smoking in college. I have noticed I tend to drink a little more now that I don't have a cigarette to distract me from my drink, but I only go out for the sole sake of drinking maybe once or twice a month so no one needs to worry that I will trade one addiction for another. Anyway, besides cigarettes, I have never had an addictive personality, whether it be to drugs, sex or anything (maybe I just need the right partner to develop a sex addiction!!). One would think that growing up in a small town, protected from all of the outside world and its evil influences, that I would have grown up to be a little more wild or just plain crazy, but that is not the case. I seem to have all of my senses about me and then some extra ones that keep me in line. We will have to talk about that in more depth later, however. For now, I have other things to do...

Defying Gravity

I had thought I might try to go to San Francisco this weekend for the Folsom Street Fair, but I could not find a reasonably priced hotel for the night. It is not that I am so much into the whole leather scene, but I thought it would be cool to visit and see what all of the fuss is about. I suppose I will have to wait until next year-- I have made it this long without attending this event, so one more year will not kill me. I know I have made statements that I was going to settle down for awhile and stay put in PHX, but I really do enjoy traveling so much and I think it is just in my blood. Speaking of things I enjoy, it is supposed to rain tomorrow. It is such a rare occurence here that I get to see it rain, I really enjoy the opportunity to get out and play in it and get wet. Although, now that the heat is over, I am sure the rain will be cold...I will still have to stick my head out in it for at least a minute or two.



October is going to be a crazy month. I am in training classes all of this month to learn some new things I will be in charge of once all of my 'kids' have been trained after the first of the year. I also applied for an analyst position that has come open (that also comes with a nice raise and a new office), so I am keeping my fingers crossed. If things go well, I may make it back to Europe before Spring. I would love to see the snow falling in Paris, although it rarely snows there from what I hear...Actually, my next 'big' trip I am planning is flying around the world next summer. All of my friends know and I am hoping the more people I tell, the easier it will be to hold myself to it. Tentively, the plans are to fly from PHX to PHL, from PHL to CDG Paris, from Paris to Dubai (I know it is not the most gay friendly place, but I am an architecture aficianado and Dubai has the world's tallest freestanding building now--the Burj Dubais, not to mention a plethora of other architectural delights), from Dubai to Sydney, Australia. Then, I am still trying to decide--part of me would love to see Hong Kong before returning home, but I think I will be ready to just head back to LAX and then to PHX because of sensory overload after leaving Australia. I guess as I start firming up my plans, I will make that decision. Plus, it may depend on if I am traveling alone or with someone special as to how the trip goes. This trip still does not take me into Africa or South America, so I can always do that round the world trip with Asia added into it at some other time. Besides, I have entered a contest at work that will take me into Beijing this Fall (it was just for fun that I entered, but I guess my odds are better for winning that than winning the lottery). We also have our company picnic on October 6th, and we always give away several (smaller, but still fun) trips during our annual picnic. I really don't have much more time left I can take off this year after spending so long in Paris, though. After all of these training classes I am in next month, I will probably try to take my remaining days off as several 3 or 4 day weekends. I also still need to visit my mom at least once around the Holidays (I told her I would make it back to KY once more this year and I am thinking the second week of December, but who knows--it may be too cold and I am out of practice driving in snow and ice and I would hate to wreck a rental car).



Here is the photo that I took while in Paris with my digital camera that everyone seems to like the most. My friend Tonya (and her friend Lori), who joined me for the first 4 days I was in Paris have dubbed this photo, 'La tour en Rose.' Enjoy!!

The Heat Is On...

Actually, the heat is finally off in PHX. After one of the hottest summers, and the most days in one summer with temperatures over 110 degrees F., the heat wave that was Summer 2007 is finally disappearing. I think the temperature was the leading cause of some of my earlier remarks after returning from Paris where the highs were in the low 70's during the day. I really do like it here in Phoenix most of the time and 9 months out of the year, the weather is perfect. I have always had an inner streak, a gypsy side if you prefer, that is constantly looking for 'the next big thing' or for a new adventure. I have always loved traveling and seeing new things and meeting new people. Now that the heat is over in my own backyard, it is time to get out locally and meet some new faces in my neighborhood instead of flying off everywhere else.

There is a lot of truth in the theme song to Alice: Phoenix is one of those cities where you can be the new girl in town even for 9 seasons because you are always meeting new people. While at times frustrating to me, the one thing I can say about Phoenix is if you stop going out for a few months, it is a whole new group of faces at the bars and clubs. I seem to barely go out to the bars/clubs anymore, so it is very rare for me to see a familiar face--most of my free time is spent with current people I consider my friends and family. I learned this lesson in my youth: bars are usually best for meeting alcoholics. Besides, I am sure there are guys out there somewhere besides at bars/clubs who would like to meet a guy who is a little crazy at times, but is always fun to be around. (This is your hint to leave a comment if you are still reading this) Just remember, I do have a 110 minimum IQ rule--You must be this smart to ride this ride. So, if you are dorky (do people still use this word?), don't bother, but a little nerdy would be just fine. While looks are what can first attract me to a person, it is personality that keeps me attracted. It is funny that I even think that way: now that I am in my 30's, my whole outlook on dating, sex, etc, has changed and things that were once important to me are no longer important and vice versa. But, think about it--if you can't stimulate me over dinner, how do you expect to stimulate me in bed?

So as the daytime highs continue their steady decline into a new winter of discontent and the days start getting as short as the skirts worn by the ladies of the night (and some of the guys) on Van Buren, keep in mind that the temperature only has to drop lower on one side of my bedroom window. (I tend to be a very passionate person if I am with someone I like...)

Encore une Fois

I have made it back from Paris safely; while I didn't meet a nice French boy named Pascal and get hitched, I did meet several nice guys at the bars/cafe's that I had fun with while there. I guess it also helped that I studied French for 3 years in High School and 2 years in college and I could speak the language and could communicate my needs while there. I went to several museums, including the Musee d'Orsay and le Louvre and saw the Pierre et Gilles display at Jeu de Paume, also. Here is the site where you can see some of their most famous artwork and if you are not familiar with this couple, you should google them: http://www.jeudepaume.org/?page=article&idArt=257&lieu=1&idImg=379 . At le Louvre, I saw Mona and Venus of course, but I spent most of my time in the Egyptian exhibits completely fascinated at the pieces the museum had acquired over the years. I inherited part of a collection of coins from my father when he passed away in 2001, and my favorite is a 1/20 Qirsh from Egypt from the year 32A.D, but even it paled in age compared to seeing sphynx, mummies/sacarphogus and a statue of Ramses. I have also now seen 2 of the 3 Obelisks (the one in NYC and the one in Paris) leaving only the one in London to see now. The one in Paris stood originally in front of the Luxor pyramid and now stands on Place de la Concorde, exactly where the guillotine once stood that killed Louis XVI, Marie Antoinette and others. Interestingly, I thought, the American Embassy is located here, too.

For your viewing pleasure, above is a pic of me on the Seine with La Tour Eiffel in the background.

Right Here, Right Now

I came across a blog for someone I went to school with and I was struck that she had gotten so much older until I realized that I was the same age (at least we both still look incredible!)...How time seems to go by faster the older you get. Anyway, I do not want to think about age right now. I have decided to fly to Chicago this weekend on basically a food trip--I have a strange White Castle craving and a craving for some deep dish pizza and maybe an Italian beef sub. Also, I will try to catch up with some friends I have not seen for awhile and go hang out with them in BoysTown or something fun.

Today is gonna be the day....

I have had this site for awhile, but have never added anything to it beyond a short description of me and my picture. I thought I should start sharing some things about me and my life thus far. I grew up in the small town of Mount Vernon, in Southeastern KY, but left right after turning 18. Went to college at the University of Kentucky until I realized that even Lexington was a small town and transferred to the University of Louisville after my second year. I moved to Florida after college (first to Beverly Hills and then to Ocala) and after a few years there, I ended up in Phoenix in 1997 after a short stint in Denver. I moved back east to Chicago (the Schaumburg neighborhood) for about 5 months in 2001, but came back to the warm weather of Phoenix during my first winter there. I thought it would be nice to be within an easy day's drive to visit my family, but I had already become a desert rat. I have been in Phoenix ever since and I have to say that I highly prefer scraping the sunshine off of my car than snow and ice. My next move will either be to California or to NYC in the next few years unless I meet Pascal while I am backpacking around Europe this fall and I find my 'joie de vivre' in Paris. My dreams of meeting someone nice named Pascal are related to a story I will tell all of you some day--I promise.

Back on Earth, things have become stale in Phoenix, even though I cannot find any specific complaints, and I feel I am so ready to pick up and move. LA is nice (weather included) but so expensive and I know it gets cold in NYC, but still no snow to scrape off a car--who needs a car with 24 hour Metro and with the money I would save on a car payment and insurance, I could easily afford the higher rent of Manhattan (and NYC has MoMA).

Oh, and who am I kidding--Pascal, Paris?? Any good looking French guy will do and his name doesn't have to be Pascal. ;-) I have decided it just sucks being suddenly single again as more of my friends seem to be settling down these years. Although I enjoy spending time with them, being a 3rd or 5th wheel is not the most fun way to spend the evening. So, I am greatly torn--I have a great job with potential to move anywhere I want, but I also make enough money to travel anywhere I want to go so I am not locked up in Phoenix. But when I think of what I am leaving and compare it to what I could be gaining, I still get scared. So maybe that is my answer: the time is not right because things have not gotten that bad. At the same time, I don't want to wait until things get 'that bad.' I am beginning to ramble, so enough said.

On a lighter note, I made it to San Francisco for gay pride for the first time last month and I strongly encourage everyone to attend at least once. Here is a picture I took of some 'curiously strong boys.'




I will tell you more about my past, my present and my future in upcoming posts, so check back frequently.